The Dance of the Doormat

It's Saturday morning, my sleep in day and I'm sitting here fuming! Again!
It's so true what they say about "Dogs having masters and Cats having Servants".
My kids are way old enough to get up quietly, get there own breakfast and blob out in front of Saturday morning TV without needing to disturb me.  Those clever children worked out from an early age that Mummy doesn't do mornings.  Unfortunately my cat 'Moon Goon' completely ignores that fact.  EVERY morning usually round the 5am mark she begins her daily torture training .  It starts with her leaving the 7yr olds bed and stealthily jumping up onto the end of ours, she will then pad up over my body and leap onto the top of our bedhead right above my face.  She will sit for a minute.  I can subconsciously feel her death stare but I pretend I can't.  Its like my first warning which I desperately try to ignore.  If she gets no reaction from me she will then leap noisily across to the top of my drawers and start systematically knocking shit off.  I then grab whatever is closest to me a pillow.. a book.. a dinosaur and throw it at her to get her to jump down.  She waits 5 minutes or so for me to fall back into a deep slumber and then begins the circuit all over again.  In my head I know that I should just get up and let her out the first time but I have this stubborn part of me that says "Don't be a victim to the cat, she will not win this time!" This continues for a good hour or so until I can't take it any longer, throw back my warm duvet, deliver a resigned "OMG Moon Fuck off" and stomp down the hallway with the cat miaowing lovingly through my legs and let her into the lounge.  Sometimes if the husband is home and he is in a deep sleep, I can nudge him forcefully and say "the cat wants out" and he seems to jump up on autopilot and go open the door.  I'm not sure he even wakes up.  Its awesome.  But as he is away 4 nights a week, so the rest of the time she just trains me.
Every morning I think tonight I'm going to make her sleep in the lounge but as she is coming up 19 and realistically we probably don't have heaps more time with her I just can't do it.  She's bloody lucky she's lasted this long with all her early morning wake up calls.